I was a semi-permanent fixture at the Leyden’s house in Southbury during my middle school and high school years. There were countless days of adventure around the farm on Old Field Rd, and I recall on many occasions staying past my welcome to partake in a hearty dinner while relaxing on lawn chairs in the back yard. Sometimes we’d feed the cows, or even shoot the .22 rifle at a tin can perched upon the back fence.
Mark (one of my closest friends to this day), Shannon, Sean, and their unforgettable parents - Maureen and “Jerry” were like a second family to me. Of course, I always addressed Jerry as “Mr. Leyden”. He was warm, but also a little scary to me as a kid. Warm because he smiled a lot. In fact, Mr. Leyden’s wry and knowing smile was one of his most memorable traits. However, his sharp intellect and unshakable logic was intimidating to young lads trying to maneuver past parental boundaries. I’m sure he knew what you were thinking and then what you were gonna say well before it tumbled aimlessly out your mouth. Then he’d smile at your tall tale or your little scheme, and not fall for it. Mr. Leyden would almost always call Mark “Scoobs”. “Scoobs” he’d say, “You and Chris have goofed around enough this weekend, it’s a school night, you’ve got homework to do.” The Leyden’s knew I’d be back soon enough to raid their stash of chocolate ice cream.
To me, Mr. Leyden was always ahead of the game. He knew where technology was going, and he seemed to have a careful plan for just about everything. I believe he went to bed each night thinking about how he could make life more interesting, and often woke up determined to bring new insights, new toys, and new adventures to his family and friends.
Call it “trickle down” if you will, but I learned a great many skills from my time with Mark and his dad. How to stack hay, how to shoot a rifle, how to properly swing a hammer, how NOT to ride a motorcycle, what “Compaq” means, how to use a coal stove, The joys of HBO, how to kick a soccer ball, the value of very new and very old gadgets...Yup, I could go on and on.
And then you have Mr. Leyden’s unwavering dedication to Mrs. Leyden and the kids. You’d feel it in your bones the moment you walked thru the back door. Mark’s parents could be found hanging out together in the kitchen wearing big smiles, fanny packs, and tighter-than-heck spandex shorts. I’d grab a banana (without asking) and check in with them. They’d give me and Mark crap about something, and I’d be OK with it. Actually, I really miss it. That was 35 years ago, and though I am no longer a young man, I do feel spiritually renewed in remembering these moments with the Leyden family, as well as eternally grateful for their love and acceptance over the years.
Peace and love be with you, as you walk to the light, Mr. Leyden. Say Hi to Mrs. Leyden for me.
